bad news travels fast

cian2

Dalayan Master
i never really knew the appropriate time to make this post or if i should at all. but here we are. okay, i kept this under wraps for awhile but it's pretty well out there now so i just want to make my general post about this.

first of all, ive had crohn's disease and bipolar since i was 14 which makes for some interesting episodes. around jan 2013 i passed out apparently and my roommate found me and took me to the ER and i was in an anemic coma and they did a colonoscopy and found burst and potentially malignant polyps. as well as massive inflammation. colon cancer.

i dont plan on dying tomorrow or anything but i just want to throw this out there right now. it's crazy to think i've played this game for like 8 years. i think i was 20 and just casually leveling a necro on WR while raiding on WoW. i think ndhk was the top raid zone back then, either that or OP had just been released.

i probably never would have stuck around until a revisited the game a few years later (<-- reg date) and decided i was gonna actually hit it. i was living in italy at the time and ran into two people who would change everything: iance and dzillon. they got me into PR and suddenly i was raiding in this game at night then WoW on gmt+2, aka from 7pm to like 6 am.

i was kind of just another face in the crowd for a long time until i met the most important i would meet, lleoc. we clashed so often but our bond became so strong and we decided we were going to reach the top of the game no matter what. so we made dibs, established a leadership reputation and well, would "meet" (ialready knew them) zorlon and glorax and i would be invited to fwf on the condition i could bring my 2 friends: versul and lleoc

this was the golden era where fwf took off and marza was shitting out gold content and we were dropping new bosses monthly and everyone was having a great time. eventually i was made a co guild leader of fwf and a dev and well, i won't get into the dev thing but i wanted to give back to the game and i hope you guys appreciate the few things i was able to do (cesspits, ofgats, overgrowth)

SO. i'm going to miss a ton of people and most of you ive talked to one on one already so whatever.

slaariel: i am truly sorry things turned out the way we did. i know i was a drunken unstable idiot a lot of times and there was only so much you could take. i wanted to make amends with you but i don't blame you for writing me off, i probably would have too.

bango: you were a great leader and i learned a lot from you about leadership and just various life skills in general. in my opinion, you were the greatest leader this server has or will ever see.

solosolki: i worry a lot about you because we both have crazy addictive personalities and i hope you can find some stability in your life. you are a very genuine person and thats a great quality to have.

lleoc: theres not much left to say that i didn't tell you personally. i cant even articulate how much you meant to me and the fact that our relationship ended the way it did is a big regret in my life. i just hope you remember the good times more often than the bad.

marza: thank you for taking a chance on me and being patient. i feel like i really put my time in to figure out how to dev and try to learn from you in a mentor sort of way. i know it was frustrating for you at times but you never gave up on me. also, you are a genius.

dzillon: thank you giving some shitty 2k mana cleric a chance. you are probably the reason i kept playing. IS YOUR BRAIN FUCKING STOOPID?

woldaff: i know i was nothing but a pain in your ass but please believe me when i say my intentions were good, i just dont have a good mental compass.

im sure ill edit this a million more times but finally:

Everyone who put up with me, from Phoenix Rising to Sacred Band to Fair Weather Friends, those of who dealt with my shortcomings as a guild leader and helped me out (erude jraul kiseble glorax vartenaal tinkaa) THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. this is just an internet video game but the people are real and life is so fleeting that i hope you all cherish the time you have.

colin
 
Bad news. But somehow, I think you might just be stubborn enough to beat this. Hope I am right. I wish you the best of luck in recovering.
 
Best of luck with everything. Never played with you in game cause you were in the big boys club and when I finally got to that level I ended up losing interest.

Still, we're all part of an exclusive little club that has played this game together and I'm sure I'm "a friend of a friend" somewhere.

You'll be in my thoughts.
 
Eisley I will miss you. Without you there will be no more eisley posts.

WHAT IS A MESSAGE BOARD WITH NO POSTS? Could a GM please stop by and answer this please.
 
Same as Ludovician: I wish I was able to share a guild with you and maybe progress with you, but you can't do that with everyone.

I wish you the best with the rest of your life.
 
thanks guys. i know i was a mega troll on the boards but i hope most people who met me in game saw through that. i tried to genuinely help others and be friendly & respect the game and it's players. i will write more later once i gather my thoughts but in the mean time please dont shit up this thread. i realize the #gs crew is like that but i am seriously dying and its not the time for that...
 
I love you, in a "special" internet way.

But what is more important is that I truly respect you as you are, with your ups and downs. You are one of few in this game that have had that impact on me.

<3
 
thanks agik, i love you & ganlas too and i know its probably somewhere between caring as much as you can and indifference but you guys meant a lot to me. i dont plan on dying tomorrow but its gonna happen so im just tryin to ... i dont know... tie up loose ends i guess. thank tou for reaching out to me, this is a really hard time and any support helps a lot
 
I was always under the impression that most Colon Cancer was treatable, are you undergoing treatments or anything? How are things looking for you?
 
This is terrible to hear...

Even though we didn't maybe always see eye to eye or have the closest relationship, I did enjoy playing with you all the times that we did. We played together when you first started deving, and I could tell you really enjoyed doing it, and wanted to make the game better. I really appreciated that. That one cat mob that you made was a really cool encounter and I wish it stayed or eventually comes back to the game. Given more time, I am sure you would have done some incredible things.

I wish you all the best in your recovery process
Sincerely,

Apros / Gares
 
I've only run into you a few times in game, but have forumquested in the same thread quite a few times :)

I wish you the best of luck with your ailments. You can do it!
 
it is treatable but im uninsured, i come from a lower class family and at the moment and i just moved out to seattle for a job so im still looking into options. so basically i dont know what i'm going to do yet. but yes colon cancer is very treatable as long as you either get a full or partial colostomy before it goes metastatic.

and thank you all for the kind words. i know i am abrasive but i'm just a forum troll. i hope those of you that knew me in game knew the real me and that i'm not a complete dickhead. like i said i dont plan on dying. these forums would be so boring without me right? ;)
 
Have you looked into Obamacare (the ire of many jokes and shit but this type of situation is apparently what it is designed for)?
 
Glad to hear it's still in the treatable stages. Depending on your financial situation there might be plenty of help available, just have to contact the right people and not take NO for an answer.

I hope it goes well for you. Even though I think we've only grouped together a time or two, my heart sank when I read your first post. The boards would definitely be a duller place without your presence, as would the game.

So hang in there man, our thoughts are with you!
 
Have you looked into Obamacare (the ire of many jokes and shit but this type of situation is apparently what it is designed for)?

This is no joke the way to go (and I'm a republican.)

I own my own small business, and I got on Obamacare. It is a new business so my income level last year was very low. My health plan, which may be different than yours, costs me $86 a month after about $100 in tax breaks each month. This was about $100 less a month than it would have been if I was covered as my girl's insurance as a domestic partner. (I am on her dental plan because it was cheaper/better.) The plan I am on is actually a very good plan with IIRC a $1500 deductible.

Basically, it costs me $1032 a year and a $1500 deductible (if my income remains the same.) This is crazy cheap for the coverage. If you make less money than I do, it could be free coverage... Since you are uninsured and require serious medical treatment, sign up ASAP https://www.healthcare.gov/. Your life is worth more than $1532 dollars...
 
Hopefully you recover Eisley. It'd really suck if you don't get treatment just for lack of finances.
 
We talk all the time and hopefully you don't leave us too soon friend. You have taught me a lot and our lives too share many similarities. I just wanted to say I enjoyed and still enjoy playing Shards of Dalaya with you. Stay up and stay positive bro.
 
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